10 + Reasons why you keep getting into Abusive or Toxic Relationships, and NONE of those reasons is, “I’m stupid”

You have unresolved trauma around relationships, probably from your family of origin, when you may have been abused or neglected (neglect IS abuse) or love was conditional and scarce. It was what was modelled to you in your formative years, perhaps you witnessed domestic violence (this too is abuse to a child), therefore a template …

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Your Mental and Emotional Warrant-of-Fitness #8 Congruence – Being in Harmony with Yourself

(A Warrant-of-Fitness is the New Zealand equivalent of an M.O.T. in the UK, being a certificate to say your vehicle is road worthy.) Do you ever find yourself saying “yes” to something or someone when you really want to say,” no”? Do you have a niggling feeling in your stomach, or maybe it’s even a …

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“Everything will be OK in the end. If it’s not OK, it’s not the end” John Lennon

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA. Karen Lighthouse © Karen Lighthouse 2022 Namaste. Thanks for reading and take care until next time. If you liked what you read please leave a comment below, like or subscribe to receive my weekly posts straight to your email. Words by Karen Lighthouse. I also offer – One-on-one counselling/coaching via Zoom Group …

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Letters to your ex you’ll never send

We’ve all experienced heartbreak, and who enjoys it? No-one! When a relationship finishes our feelings don’t just automatically stop. So, what do you do with them then? Options: Stuff them down (your feelings), bottle them up, try and pretend you’re OK by putting on a brave face. Mope around, telling everyone who’ll listen (and many …

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Hello from the Other Side   

New Zealand Fern unfurling - a symbol of hope and new life                                                                                                             Don’t live your life by default If you were abused It’s not your fault You can live a life Free from pain Breaking the cycle Again and again. Reach out And start to love yourself With therapy Writing And self-help The future …

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Your Mental and Emotional Warrant-of-Fitness #7 Gratitude

(A Warrant-of-Fitness is the New Zealand equivalent of an M.O.T. in the UK, being a certificate to say your vehicle is road worthy.) The benefits of gratitude have become more widely understood and appreciated in recent times. Research shows that simply expressing gratitude or having an attitude of gratitude actually changes our brain chemistry. It …

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